I'm watching two people who are close to me go through some tough stuff. They care for each other deeply and have also been through plenty of other own crises in the past few years, but now it's about the redefinition of their own relationship. Things are messy and emotional. I can see both sides of the story. I can relate to both, agree with both, and disagree with both.
But I can't really get involved. It's not my place to do any more than be a listening ear. And its hard, oh it's hard. I want to be sympathetic, I want to offer thoughts and opinion. I want to fix this. But I can't.
I guess it's partly selfish - I have this ridiculous need to see everyone living happy ever after. I have an abhorrance of conflict (sometimes to my detriment it must be said). I want to believe in an ideal world where everything is resolvable and we can all accept each others views. Yes I know it's unrealistic. Yes I know life is messy and unpredictable (oh how I know that!), yes I know that sometimes things actually AREN'T fixable - the only thing to lessen pain is time.
The crazy thing is it's not really even any of my business. I'm an onlooker. I have no right to an opinion other than as friend or confidante. It's a good lesson for me. Listen, learn, care - but let others do what is right for them.