Sunday, May 13, 2012

a trouble shared

Isn't it great to have friends to tell ''stuff'' to?  To be able to share a worry (or a triumph) with someone can be the difference between a bad day and a good day.

People tell me stuff.  And most of the time I am absolutely stoked to be able to listen, and when asked, offer an opinion.  But sometimes it's simply not a good time.  And I find myself becoming bogged down by the sadness or troubles of others.  And I'm guilty of doing it the other way too - I am the first to admit that there have been times that I have unloaded MY stuff on to a friend without really considering if it was good timing, or appropriate.

Of course the true friend will almost always be a willing listener, advocate or cheerleader.  That's what being a friend is.  But isn't it easy to forget that they might have their own stuff going on that is just as important, or worrying?  And the other consideration is that sometimes in sharing your trouble, you might just be doubling it - by confessing something that's really big, it might make you feel better, but you might just also be then adding that burden to someone elses worry pile.

So here's a challenge for you - next time you've got something you just have to get off your chest, or a problem that just needs a second opinion ask your confessor if it's ok to spill first.

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